Today I decided to go for a run because I've been having these horrible things called feelings and I haven't been running a lot and it turns out I'm really good at math because LOOK AT THIS EQUATION IVE COME UP WITH:
[(the square root of feelings) plus (running times zero) = bitch karly to the 300th power]
So anyway it looked all nice out but it wasn't really nice out and what happened was I felt like someone was shoving icicles down my lungs and into my alveoli.
And then it felt like someone was scrubbing my lungs with sandpaper.
And then I felt like a dweeb because I was walking down the sidewalk like a lowly walker-type person with my sleeve covering my mouth so I could breathe in warm air but then really it just looked like I was eating my fist which is something that I think only crazy people are supposed to do and the whole purpose of me running was so that I could be not crazy and now everything just points to me actually being crazy.
So then I started running again and all my breathing functions seemed normal.
And then I stopped and went inside.
And then I tried really hard to win a coughing contest. I think I won. [Can you win things when you're the only one competing? I think you can. And this is my blog. So suck it.]
And then I ate spaghetti.
Now I'm wheezing when I breathe.
It's really awesome.
And I'm probably going to do it all again tomorrow.
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