SO WHAT

yeah. that's right. ATTITUDE. I've got it, and I'm gonna share it. SO WHAT?

SO WHAT if I've been sick for like two weeks and refuse to go to the doctor.
SO WHAT if all I've done in those two weeks is cringe miserably on my bed in the fetal position watching Parks and Recreation.
SO WHAT if I haven't gone running in two weeks.
SO WHAT if I just ate my third grilled cheese in 24 hours.
SO WHAT if I dipped said grilled cheese in ketchup.
SO WHAT if I kind of want another. or maybe two.
SO WHAT if I've spilled all of the following items on my bed sheet and haven't bothered to wash it yet:

1. cheez-it crumbs.
2. a considerable amount of hydrogen peroxide
3. black paint
4. ...something else
5. dorito crumbs
6. guess who just dipped her elbow in ketchup* and then got it on her sheet? (it's totally cool, my sheets are red anyway)
7. I should really stop eating on my bed.

I am a crazy person. Literally. Last night I woke up at four AM with a stabbing pain in my jaw/ear/throat and I decided to pour peroxide in my ear. I decided to do this in the dark. On my bed. Turns out, you can't see very well when it's dark and you're pouring a clear liquid into a miniscule cap. So I ended up pouring approximately a quarter cup of peroxide onto my bed and onto my arm.

This is what I exclaimed at 4AM, out loud, to no one but myself : "Well that's really fucking cute."

I then reassumed fetal position and stared at the wall for about 45 minutes until I could fall back asleep. It was totally awesome and not horrible and I didn't cry at all.


And on kind of an unrelated note, SO WHAT if I want to burn State Farm Insurance Agency to the ground. Because I have to print out, AGAIN, a grade report to prove that I graduated from college. You know, just in case they decided to, I don't know, rescind my degree in the past year. Because that's possible. So now, I'm wasting time, and paper, to send them this stupid form they already have AND I have to buy STAMPS which I've never done before and seems really really inconvenient and almost as terrible as calling a doctor's office.

You know what, State Farm? Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.

...and you probably did ride in on a horse, because it's probably cheaper than buying your stupid car insurance. And gas.

Fine: Nothing.
Ruined: Everything.


..I'm on a lot of pain medication here. I hope some of this made sense.










*fuck people who spell ketchup 'catsup'